literature

Dr part VII

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Literature Text

(scene to a building marked "Tokyo Sunshine and Smile Factory". Inside is a large garage with an assortment of equipment and half-finished projects. There are three visible vehicles, and Ice Cream Truck, a Tank, and an X-Wing. Mortimer is underneath the truck and Hiro enters with the mail)

Hiro: Mail's here, it looks like you got a few more CD's (tosses them to Mortimer as he reads off) "Pain, Sorrow and Grapefruit", "Crying Kittens, Weeping Puppies", "Everything Sucks Especially Myself"…

Mortimer: Great (Mortimer wheels out and readjusts his new metal right arm)

Hiro: looks like your new arm is working out well. Are you finally done complaining about losing your real one?

Mortimer: Yes, it may be a grievous loss, but now at least I got to play around with that Bionics Kit I got for Christmas.

Hiro: I told you you'd lose your arm if you kept cutting yourself.

(Mortimer begins to tear up)

Hiro: What? What is it?

Mortimer: Why to you always have to tease me!?!?

Hiro: Sorry, sorry *pats him on the back* your new arm looks really cool.

Mortimer: *stops crying* That's what I thought; I made a whole bunch of awesome gadgets that go with it.

Hiro: Really, like what?

Mortimer: Well, there's the wrench attachment, screwdriver attachment, hammer, saw, toothbrush, flashlight, DVD player, comical-yet-effective badger attachement, etc etc.  I have this neat little cart to carry them around.

(Mortimer reveals a cart with a whole bunch of gadgets for his arm on it)

Hiro: Oh…nice. Hey, Morty, I don't mean to insult you or anything, but…couldn't you have just built a hand attachment so you could just use that to manipulate all this stuff? Then you wouldn't need the cart or anything.

Mortimer: *bursts into tears* Why didn't I think of that!?! I'm so stupid!!

Hiro: Heeeey, I didn't mean that in a mean way. I think you cart is really cool.  And some of this stuff you'll still need. Like this…thing (holds up the blaster attachment).

Mortimer: *sniffle* that's the arm blaster I made.

Hiro: Sweet! You test it out yet?

Mortimer: Yeah, over there (motions to wall)

(frame of  wall with a fairly large target on it, There are several holes in this wall that aren't anywhere near the target).

Hiro: Were you aiming at the target or…

Mortimer: I'm just a terrible shot.

Hiro: Well, you can always practice.

Mortimer: That's true (attaches blaster).

(Masa and Mune jump in through a window and lands in the garage next to Mortimer and Hiro)

Mune: (in mid-air)YEEEEEHAAWWW!!!!

Masa: (after landing) s'up bitches?

Hiro: You…VILE CREATURES!! (Brandishes sword and Mortimer brandishes his blaster arm)

Mune: Calm down, we're here on official business.

Hiro: What business is that? VILE business?

Mune:  No…Well, if you associate us with the word 'Vile' then I guess it IS vile business.

Hiro: I knew it! You vile wench will pay for your vile business.

Mortimer: (to Hiro) Calm down

Masa: you need a Thesaurus.

Mune: As confusing and retarded as what you just said is, we came here to offer you an invitation to Boss's place to discuss a proposition.

Mortimer: Who's "Boss"?

Hiro: *through teeth* Dr. Baron von Evilsatan

Mortimer: That's not cliché or anything (sarcasm text)

Hiro: How did you find us?

Masa: Easy, this was the only unregistered Sunshine and Smile Factory in the Tokyo area.

Hiro: This smells like a trap.

Masa: I don't smell anything…

Mune: Yeah it probably does, but since you're desperate for that license of yours, you're just going to have to trust us. 

Mortimer: Where is this meeting?

Mune: Here's a map-

*Mune hands a map to Mortimer who extends his blaster to receive it. He then proceeds to accidentally disintegrate the map and put a hole in the floor.*

Mune: *jumps back* ass!

Mortimer: Sorry, Sorry, forgot about the whole…hand-replaced-with-gun thing.

Mune: Well, even though we took the sign down, I think Hiro can remember where it is, right?

Hiro: Yeah, despite your 'Boss' working there, I still enjoy Free Taco Thursday on occasion.

Mune: Right well, the meeting is in three days. See you there (coy wink)

(Masa and Mune leave out the door).

(Morty and Hiro pause)

Mortimer: Free Taco Thursday sounds awesome

Hiro: It is.

Mortimer: but he was right, you could use a Thesaurus.

Hiro: You know  I hate you

(Mortimer is shocked and tears up again)

Hiro: Stop that

Mortimer: You may hate me because I'm different, but at least I know how to use more than one adjective in a conversation!

Hiro: Ok how about this. I'll read the Thesaurus if you stop crying all the time, deal?

Mortimer: I'll try

Hiro: Good, now we need to step up our training and construction. I want to be prepared for this meeting.

Mortimer: Why? You said it yourself that this was obviously a trap.

Hiro: Well, like she said I need this license, and I'm willing to go through a little danger to get it. Anyways, villains are always very vulnerable when they think they have the upper-hand.

Mortimer: Does he have the upper-hand?

Hiro: I don't think so. He can't be that powerful if he's working at a Taco Juan's. I think those demons are what we have to worry about, if we get past them, the mastermind should be an easy fight.

Mortimer: and what if he isn't?

Hiro: Than I have that secret weapon your Uncle taught me.

Mortimer: with your toy sword.

Hiro: *sigh* YES with my toy sword.

Mortimer: Ok I'll get working on my equipment

Hiro: Don't even think about taking that damn cart.

Mortimer: *cries AGAIN* why must you hate me?

Hiro: Because the internet told me to, and what did I say about that crying?
We find out what Hiro has been up to in the intervening months
© 2009 - 2024 twicethepirate
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thewyteangel's avatar
LOL Mortimer sliced his hand off. This is great. I can't get enough of your stuff :) Love how Masa is always shooting his mouth off : D